Are you honest with important others in your life about how important the spiritual search is to you? If not, why not? Often, seekers aren't honest because they are afraid of being judged, and of losing or hurting the image that others have of them. This will act as an obstacle to the spiritual search in the end, however, because the same fear that prevents honesty will also prevent a complete letting go into the practice.
Videos of just-concluded series of workshops on self-inquiry and surrender
On January 30, February 6, and February 13, I had the pleasure of leading three satsangs on self-inquiry and surrender in cooperation with the spiritual organization Awakening Together. The videos of the events are below.
First Session: Self-Inquiry
Second Session: Surrender
Third Session: Both Self-inquiry and Surrender
Am I doing this right? Confusion is natural in the quest for the Self.
Most seekers practicing self-inquiry and surrender inevitably run into confusion and a sense that they're doing the practice wrong. Confusion is natural: these practices only appear to be practices. They are actually pointers to the Self. You are not really doing inquiry or surrender; you ARE inquiry and surrender, in truth. So confusion is natural, because the practice leads you to this conclusion. The practices themselves will be your teacher. Live in the struggle and the uncertainty -- you will be led onward. Also, the real reason for the lack of final clarity in these practices is inevitably because attachment -- caring about the results of things in life, and feeling that you have to engage with them to control them -- is too strong. These attachments are afraid of seeing the truth, so they prevent clarity. Through the practice, attachment weakens, and clarity eventually dawns.
The mind is a grasping instrument and the Truth is non-grasping
The mind attempts to grasp objects for happiness & in looking for the existential truth, but the real Truth is not in any particular object, but in the non-grasping action of the mind. But things become tricky, then, because seekers cannot rest content merely with the mind being in a non-grasping *state* -- such a state comes and goes. The practice must persist until the state is recognized as a reflection of eternal truth.
Akilesh Ayyar interviewed by Awakening Together
The spiritual organization Awakening Together interviewed Akilesh in a live satsang on November 21, 2021. Topics included surrender, self-inquiry, obstacles seekers encounter, and more.
Surrender as the vigilant refusal to ever un-relax
I often describe surrender as ignoring all thought except the thought of surrender, and relaxing. These two instructions really boil down to the same thing. Avoiding absorption in thought is precisely about not being pulled into reacting using what feels like your willpower.
Subtle traps for the seeker: void/blankness, quiet, bliss, sleep, and laya
The seeker who inquires or surrenders deeply may be tempted to stop at various mind states that seem like the end of the line: states ranging from the futility or impassability of the void to various kinds of bliss. It is important to recognize these states for the traps they are. When you encounter anything that is less than light, clear, freeing, effortless insight that allows for no further questions -- continue.
Interview by Gary Haskins
Gary Haskins interviewed me on nonduality, Ramana Maharshi, and the practice on his Youtube channel The Conscious Perspective.
Self-inquiry and surrender are compatible with other tasks because you are not the doer
Self-inquiry and surrender seem incompatible with other tasks -- how can you concentrate on two things at once? In fact, however, you do not even concentrate on one thing... that is all part of the egoic illusion, which believes itself to be separate and independent. Self-inquiry and surrender appear to be effortful activities, but in fact simply describe the fact of the Self in its eternal status as subject, as turning away from objects.
Surrender and inquiry are like trying to go to sleep
A useful analogy for a seeker engaged in surrender or self-inquiry is to think about what it's like to go to sleep. To fall asleep, you must relax, close your eyes, and fall away from everything in the waking world. You must let go without expectation. Asking "Am I asleep?", trying to notice the falling-asleep process, or trying to recreate the sleep you had a few weeks ago will all interfere with falling asleep. And the waking one will never know what it is like to be asleep. The seeker must have the same attitude.